Thanks for Wiping My Butt Mother���s Day Card

We ship worldwide. Shipping options and prices show up at checkout based on what you’re ordering and where it’s headed. If you need something by a specific date, pick the fastest option available and order sooner than your anxiety would prefer.

Most items are made to order, so they usually ship in a few business days. Once it’s on the move, you’ll get tracking. If the tracking looks like it’s taking a scenic tour of the underworld, give it 24–48 hours to update.

No returns, and that’s on purpose. Everything is made to order, so we can’t take items back for change-of-mind, sizing, or preference.

If your item arrives misprinted, damaged, or straight-up wrong, contact us and we’ll make it right.

Message us ASAP. If we can catch it before production or shipment, we’ll update it. If it’s already in motion, we can’t reroute it, because shipping carriers love chaos and paperwork.

Check the size chart on the product page and compare it to something you already own and love. If you’re between sizes, sizing up usually gives that comfy, oversized, “main character in a haunted library” fit.

Treat your pieces like spellwork, gently. Follow the care instructions on the listing when provided. In general: cold wash, inside out, and avoid blasting it with high heat unless you’re trying to summon shrinkage.

Because most items are made to order, changes and cancellations are only possible within a short window after purchase. If you need to edit something, contact us immediately and we’ll do our best to catch it in time.

Email howdy@starryskiesaustin.com and send us the details, order number included if you have one. We’ll get back to you as soon as we’re done fighting the patriarchy and answering emails in the same breath.